She was not too happy with my attitude recently, and wanted a suggestion to redeem myself. Giving up something for Lent for her was suggested, and she really liked it. She decided what the sacrifices will be....
1. The word "I" is not permitted in any blog posts, tweets, or emails. She suggested using derogatory 3rd person words when referring to myself. Her favorite so far is Fatty McDickless. This is hard to do, but has made me choose my words wisely. The focus of my sentences is more on her than me these days.
2. No meat eating allowed. At all. This is hard for my carnivorous fat ass. But it is a good opportunity to eat healthily.
3. She generously allows one release a week, during sex or by myself. If it is done by myself, it must be accompanied with some pain, and my hand is not allowed to touch my tiny penis.
4. No teasing or touching or edging of my penis at all.
5. This is not a sacrifice, but something to be done. She wants me to do something positive for animals. That is a great idea. She is so wise.
