Sunday, June 26, 2011

Tiny is an annoying pest and a twit.....and is sorry.

My Mistress sent me this email today, and she is not very happy with me. My only job is to make her happy, yet all Tiny seems to do is annoy her. This makes Tiny sad. Tiny is very sorry to be a pest, Mistress. Tiny will do better from now on. Tiny promises to be amusing, not annoying. Tiny is sorry.

Enough with communicating with me via twitter DM and @ posts. SO ANNOYING! You expect me to be inconvenienced to come find you all over the internet or receive pestering email notifications about your stupid @ messages so I have to sign in there when you could email me directly here? FUCKING CONSOLIDATE. And you BETTER post an apology for me publicly admitting your irksome behavior. Since you have no life anyway you can re-post this email in your blog too so people see how much you've fucked up-- unless you're too ashamed, which you should be. Do it anyway. 

Notice I've been ignoring you lately? It's because it's too irritating to get these fucking tidbits all the time! You used to remember to save it all for a weekly email update and now you've slipped into dropping these penis-centered mini-comments like turds all over my inbox daily. (Mini is no surprise since they match your dick size so no wonder you like the 140 character thing....that and utter laziness.)

Do better, NOW. If you weren't hiding in the Midwest I'd slap you into next week and pulverize your balls so it's highly unsatisfying that the punishments I dole out are usually about orgasm denial or just neglecting you instead of cathartic sadism. But you're used to not satisfying women, aren't you, dickless? Speaking of release allotment, you have NONE until the 4th of July when you celebrate your non-independence. 
Also, I demand you make video of yourself punching your minuscule dick ten times (and *hard*) ASAP. 

When you can't think of anything else to do except play around on twitter all day, remember you can always write blog entries about being a dickless pansy, can't you? Give us all some laughs. You may still post to twitter but only because it humiliates you and also other Mistresses keep you in check which I like. Being a big fat baby you need constant supervision. 

AND GET WORKING ON THOSE ETIQUETTE TRAINING videos, slacker! Privacy is a lame excuse; do them in the bathroom in silence. 

Lastly, I can't believe I even have to say this but you will do AT LEAST ONE charity act before the end of July. I suggest you volunteer in a soup kitchen. You may submit proposals for other ideas if you are drawn towards another service act and then wait for my approval. Donation via money is acceptable but let me know where it's going and email/send me documentation. (With in person acts I trust you will be honest.) In short, you are not just a servant to me and of course animals, but also a servant to humanity at large. Once a month (minimum) you will devote time and/or money to this endeavor. 

You are only allowed 3 twitter posts today so use them well!  


No comments:

Post a Comment